Increasing Your Receptivity To Love

The best way to apply the ideas in this article is to practice those that are lacking in your life. Most of you are already prepared for love in some of the ways I will mention. The more ways you are prepared for love, the greater the chances of being receptive to love and being able to sustain love when and if it arrives. To begin preparing for love in adulthood we must first accept that much of what we do in our love-lives is learned. To our advantage, if something is learned it can be unlearned and something new relearned. Many people learn that love is not tolerable or even comfortable as a feeling. They learn to substitute control for the state of mind required to be in love. Now as an adult it is necessary to unlearn these negative love-life lessons and relearn something more compatible with the development of love in our lives. To be prepared for love in adulthood means learning and practicing a ‘love-life psychology’ that is receptive to a healthy love relationship. Your love-life psychology is your psychological pattern of thinking, feeling, and acting when looking for, committing to, and being in love.

Psychological Receptivity to Love

A healthy and prepared love-life psychology includes an understanding of the feeling of love as a life experience that contains the following characteristics: vulnerability, spontaneity, forgiveness, faith in your capacity to heal, diminished control, and a rational desire to give to others. My list may not be compatible with common views on what is required to manage a love-life. For example, most people believe that there should be far more strategy or control and far less of the vulnerable feelings when dealing with love. Taking charge and being in control are the proscriptions most commonly given to lovers these days. My concern is that this attitude and the actions it inspires are not preparing people for love as a very specific emotional experience.